My rejection infection…
Have you ever experienced rejection before? I have, more times than I care to admit. The infection started when my biological father abandoned me.
It seemed obvious….. he didn’t want to be my father because he ran away. Relatives tell me he had a drug problem and he ran to save his life.
Others say he had an affair with some other woman. It is hard to decide what is true.
All I know is, he left. Being abandoned by my father created a pit of loneliness in my heart. I have often wondered: what did I do so badly as a child to cause him to leave?
How it has affected me….
Consequently, rejection has leaked into my relationships.
As a young adult, I chose to associate myself with people who were toxic because of my desire to be loved and to numb the pain of loneliness.
As a result, I married someone (now my ex- husband) who decided porn, drugs and molesting children were more appealing than being faithful in our marriage.
His betrayal of our relationship resembled a knife piercing my heart. While it was for the best that we separated and divorced, the rejection was devastating.
Now, it is difficult for me to trust anyone. My knee jerk reaction is to run away when someone tries to get close to me.
Running is safer because then I won’t have to deal with the excruciating pain of rejection.
Does my writing matter?
Then, there is this writing career. When I sit down to write, my throat closes up, my heart beats rapidly, and my palms sweat.
Fear whispers… will anyone connect to my words? Anyone at all?
The cursor on my computer taunts me with questions like: are you good enough? Do you have anything important to say? Who cares anyway?Stop caring more about what others think than your passion.
I throw my hands up in frustration and walk away from the computer without writing at all.
Even perceived rejection compels me to hide under the covers. Relationships and writing. The two scariest parts of my life, but the most worthwhile.
What can you do about it?
So, How can we overcome this ugly rejection infection?
1. Remember that God Accepts you.
2. Stop caring more about what others think than your passion.
3. Accept that not everyone is going to like you
4. Live your life to please God, not people.
5. Remember that people might leave you and fail you, but God won’t.
After applying these 5 principles to my own life, I’ve come to realize the idea of writing or engaging in relationships is not as scary when I remember who really accepts me.
What have you done to overcome rejection? How has rejection affected your life? Share in the comments below.
© 2016 – 2017, Rhonda Marie Stalb. All rights reserved.
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